We Should Be Talking About Suicide — Here's How to Do It Correctly

By De Elizabeth and Lauren Rearick


because the tenth leading cause of death In the
U.S., Suicide remains an ongoing topic in the mental health community, and about the world. With more than 43 million American adults currently dealing with mental illness, the significance of how we talk about suicide has once again come to light in the wake of three rather publicized deaths, all inside the range of a week: those of Sydney Aiello, a former student at Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School in Parkland, Florida; a second, currently unnamed Parkland student; and Jeremy Richman, a 49-year-old father of a Sandy Hook Elementary School shooting victim.


All three deaths were announced on inside the same week, however it’s not possible to know if there was a link between each incident behind the fact that all three people were impacted by gun violence at some point in their lives. For his part, Richman founded the Avielle Foundation in honor of his daughter, who was among the 20 students and 7 adults killed at Sandy Hook in 2012. The non-profit agency was created to “prevent violence by building compassion through brain statistics, community engagement, and education.” And Sydney’s mother, Cara Aiello, told CBS Miami that her daughter had struggled with post-traumatic stress disorder after the 2018 attack at MSDHS, noting Sydney remained fearful of encountering another act of gun violence. She added that she wants her daughter’s struggles to help others, and she reminded community members to seek help if they required it.


Finding that help isn’t routinely easy, even for young people with limited resources. “About halfway through my freshman year of college, I realized I was struggling with mental health,” a 20-year-old named Delaney told MTV News. Yet her school supplied counseling, there was a waitlist. “I was advised to go out into the community to seek out a therapist,” she explained. “I was fortunate enough to be able do do that, yet I know that not each person is.” Most mental health programs prioritize helping those with suicidal ideations if they can, although people should feel empowered to seek help at the initial sign of stress, whether minor or dire.


And to point to PTSD, or one specific incident alone, because the sole cause of a suicide can dangerously oversimplify suicide and suicidal ideation, and leave several gun violence survivors feeling hopeless. Surviving a school shooting can certainly be disruptive to someone’s mental health, and such an event can understandably cause lasting trauma. Nevertheless, a host of issues contribute to instances of suicide, which is why it is imperative that those dealing with suicidal ideation feel safe enough to ask for help, and that our society at large is better equipped to talk about suicide, and offer support and resources to those experiencing ideations.


“What we know to be true is that if somebody dies by suicide in a specific community ... And then the other folks in that community are at a much higher risk for also dying by suicide. And that's why the word contagion comes up in this conversation,” Chris Bright, Director of Public Training for The Trevor Project, told MTV News. “For susceptible populations ... The exposure to inappropriate ways of talking about suicide or inappropriate depictions of suicide moves them at a higher risk for attempting suicide soon after that exposure.” For that reason, Trevor Project provides a variety of resources for young people who might be struggling with suicidal ideation, including both a phone and text hotline, and also a chat service.


Melissa McCormick, a licensed mental health counselor in Longwood, Florida, also told MTV News that people should avoid sharing specific specifics of how someone died. “When someone can envision specifics of a traumatic event, they can picture it more thoroughly, and are more likely to struggle with trauma responses,” McCormick said.


The three recent deaths have procured a lot of media coverage, yet not all reporting has been responsible, with several outlets using troubling language to describe the events. (MTV News is choosing not to link to the stories question group in attempt to minimize the chances of contagion.)


Although the responsibility extends in back of reporters; through social media, we be able to share data instantaneously with followers and companions alike. While posting news stories of rather publicized suicides is often done in good faith, such efforts can some days have an adverse effect. We don’t know who within our online circles might be struggling, and stories that simply relay specifics of suicides without any hope or intelligence for prevention can be hugely damaging, especially if dangerous language is used.


Both Bright and McCormick note that we should never use the phrase “committed suicide” as soon as talking about someone’s death; rather, it’s essential to mention “died by suicide," as HuffPost points out.


Bright posed the question: “When do you normally hear the phrase ‘committed?’ Response The solution is, you generally hear it in regards to a crime... You don’t often hear it in ways that have positive connotations. So whenever you use that word, you’re further stigmatizing something that is already hard to talk about.”


“Died by suicide,” in opposition, is neutral. “It's just a very factual way to talk about something that isn't stigmatized,” Bright mentioned. “It doesn't use words that make people afraid.” McCormick added that making these conscious word choices “shows the significance of shifting our perspective on suicide.”


None of this is to mention that we shouldn’t discuss suicide at all; case in point, it’s just the opposite. We must discuss it, both categorize in attempt to continue to lower stigma, although also to reassure other people that they aren’t alone.


And that’s why it’s more key than ever to have the genuine equipment to discuss suicide safely and productively. Our words matter, and by using the correct language, we can construct a safer environment for those struggling with suicidal ideation. Responsible conversations can empower people to ask for help; some days, it’s just as simple as sharing intelligence about suicide prevention, or telling a friend that you’re there to listen. Although it’s also critical that people feel they have access to seek professional help should they require it, without stigma; in some cases, you may not be equipped to help someone in the way a counselor or a doctor can, and the ideal way you could be there them is by supporting them if they find the care they need.


“Trauma and loss don’t just go away, you should learn to survive with it through getting support,” David Hogg, a member of March for Our Lives, the student-led organization really interested in gun reform, wrote on Twitter. “We should be spending all of the cash politicians hope to spend on arming teachers on something that will actually save lives, like mental health care in our schools.”


There are also online resources obtainable for people experiencing suicidal ideation, and those who hope to learn more about how to completely discuss suicide. Half of Us,  The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline, and the Trans Lifeline also offer support services through telephone hotlines (call 1-800-273-TALK), while the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention and Suicide Awareness Voices of Education supply online resources. The National Alliance for Mental Illness helpline can assist supply answers to questions about treatment options; though they never allocate therapy or suggest individualized suggestions for therapists in your area, they might have the ability to help point callers in the correct direction. The American Psychological Association also provides resources and databases for those seeking professional help.


“Young people should have the ability to talk about suicide,” Bright emphasized to MTV News. “They should have the ability to talk about their feelings and the things that they have going on in their lives, and so they aspire have the ability to calculate the companions who are going to performer name that kind of conversation with respect, dignity, and support.”


If you or someone you know is struggling with their emotional health, head to halfofus.Com for ways to get help.