Amber Tamblyn Has Some Advice To Men Who Want To Be Allies To Women

it looked like the full nation was listening any time Oprah declared, "A new day is on the horizon!" To a room full of Hollywood elites at the 2018 Golden Globes. A roaring applause erupted by way of the Beverly Hilton — led by the star-studded females who wore all-black in solidarity with victims of sexual harassment — followed by passionate pleas for her to run for president.


Yet Oprah has since confirmed that she plans to not be running for commander in chief, her powerful call to action stands as a defining moment in the #MeToo movement — a crusade that has seen an increasing number of people step forward, with their own stories of sexism and workplace harassment, to mention Time's Up.


One voice that has been steady in her support of the movement, even before it was an organized effort, belongs to actress, writer, producer, and director Amber Tamblyn — yet it's not courage that's driving her to speak out.


"I don't know if I'm brave. I have mixed feelings about that word," Tamblyn told MTV News at the Makers Conference in Los Angeles. "I feel susceptible all of the time and I feel very raw a lot of the time, and I’m habitually very aware of how the world affects me and why I affect the world. Some days there really are really pretty moments of bravery that shoot out from that, however I feel very much like anyone else," she said.


Call it bravery, or call it vulnerability, nevertheless as soon as it really matters, Tamblyn understands how to use her experience to help create change, as evidenced by her mobile and candid Instagram and Twitter presence, her open letter to actor James Woods in Teen Vogue, and her New York Times essay, “I’m Done With Not Being Believed.”


"I just pick to reside in the world honestly. Sincerity makes you susceptible by default, and the fact that we pick to stay in the world the way that we do is complicated at times, yet also really needed, and in the event you pick to be a mobile member and speak up against things, you have no choice however to order kind of be weak towards things," she mentioned. "It's the act of living. There really is no other choice for me."


For those who also feel compelled to speak up, Tamblyn advises to do so carefully and with a deep self-awareness. "Pause before you are going to inflict something on someone. Pause before you make a statement about something. I really believe strongly that we should wait before we mention big, powerful things and really listen to our own voices before we let the rest of the world’s voice impact how we feel," she said.


As the Time's Up movement shifts from girls sharing their experiences into a "action-oriented" phase that requires male support, it's necessary to speak with intention — or some days, not speak at all.


"It's really critical that boys lead not by telling us what sort of stories we should or shouldn’t tell — they don't need to be a piece of that conversation. In my suggestion, I don't need to hear a gentleman mention that we've gone also far and there's also several stories being told," Tamblyn mentioned. "We need boys to really be allies and to support girls in the task to change things, and that shows they require to be vocal about several, several things, including the abuses against women’s bodies, although also things like pay disparity and bullying in school."


So, what does being an ally entail? Any man who isn't sure where to start, Tamblyn suggests seeking guidance in the most familiar places.


"We have to begin changing things, and boys really aspire to know how they will help, and it's essential for gentlemen, and even gentlemen, to look at the ladies they love, whether it's their girlfriends, best companions, or their sisters, or maybe their mothers or their grandmothers or their wives," she mentioned. "Look down the line of your relationships to ladies and look for inequalities. You have the individual capacity, as males and gentlemen, to stand up for ladies, whether it's at school or at work or any other place."